32 year old Pagan
female who lives in Florida with her guy and two cats, loves Disney,
reads fanatically, tinkers in photography and believes growing up is
overrated.
Deals with several chronic health
concerns and worked part-time as an Admin Assist until the company
closed in November 2009. Looking once again for a part time job.
Also runs her own small business,
PhoenixFire Designs.
Help support Pet Cancer Awareness
I lost my beloved cat,
Kush, to cancer in 2003. Cancer is the #1 disease-related cause of death
for cats and dogs. With your support, together we can find a cure
ASPCA
The American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals
details
"seasons greetings 2009" ver.
25
originally created 12/7/09 and designed for 1024x768 or larger,
CSS capable browser Like
There are people on the net that
have nothing better to do with their time then be nasty to other
people online. They post rude comments, spend hours a day talking
about sites they hate so much, that they well, spend hours a day
talking about them. (lame) They mock the owners and posters for
their opinions and their right to free speech. They expect everyone
to fit into their narrow-minded little world view or else they throw
a temper tantrum.
To these people I say
grow up.
Here's a bit of info people...the
web is a HUGE place. If you don't like what I say here, or who I am,
or what I do, or talk about, or what I look like, or the color of my
hair, or whatever asinine thing you dwell on,
go somewhere else. It's really, really easy. Honest. You just
click the little "x" in the corner of your browser and *poof* the
offending, big, mean and nasty site has disappeared.
I pay for this site. It's mine.
That means I can use it for whatever the hell I want to. Don't like
it if I'm bitching about something in my life? Oh fucking well. Go
somewhere else. Think I'm stupid for expressing my thoughts? Too
fucking bad, don't read them. Somewhere along the line, someone
forgot this simple fact: Live and let live
Don't like me, cool, fine, whatever, I don't care. This
journal is NOT for you. It's for me. I'm not in it for popularity or
fame or anything stupid like that. I write it because I need to
write and express myself and get things out of my head sometimes. So
read or don't, it doesn't matter, but don't waste my time (or yours)
bitching about it.
*gets off soapbox*
: : seasons greetings : :
my handcrafted jewelry, wearable
horns and more!
all hand made
M. Turner
Po Box 1484
Elfers, FL 34680
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Thursday, March 11, 2010
Well celebrations about Rand moving were premature. We saw him tonight and talked tithe nurse again and got another detailed update. He's been off sedation for three days now. And his movements are merely "twitch" type motions that are very brain stem, and not actually responsive, conscious movements.
Physically he's doing pretty well. His heart is healing nicely and while his remaining kidney isn't really functioning, that's not a real problem in that it's treatable.
So we're left with the neurological problems. The fact that he's not waking up is worrisome. We're at the stage where it's hurry up and wait. Either he will wake up or he won't. And there is no promise that he will wake up. There is also no promise that if he does wake up, he will be himself. He could be gone even if he opens his eyes tomorrow - and that I think is even more horrifying then the idea he won't wake up at all.
I am really upset. I am already stressed out and running beyond empty and exhausted and I don't know what to do about any of it. I haven't had time to do anything at all; just nothing is ever enough time for everything and day after day i'm getting further and further behind. I haven't even had time for simple things like blog updates or reading up on my friends list or updating my jewelery or anything! And I am getting hours less sleep each night then I need and still...it's not enough. Things just feel like they're crumbling all around me.
I was on the phone all by myself today at work talking to our clients and it went well but it's still very dull and repeatitve and I find myself wanting to call in more days then not. I mean I don't but it's hard because I so want too. I think if so much else wasn't going on, it would be easier to deal with that one change and the schedule change and the loss of free time but with everythig else goingn on as well? It's really killing me.
Anyway that's tonight in a brief nutshell. Things are bad and feeling bleak right now and I am really just trashed and feeling pretty ruined.
I'm not sure honestly what to do about anything anymore.
