32 year old Pagan
female who lives in Florida with her guy and two cats, loves Disney,
reads fanatically, tinkers in photography and believes growing up is
overrated.
Deals with several chronic health
concerns and worked part-time as an Admin Assist until the company
closed in November 2009. Looking once again for a part time job.
Also runs her own small business,
PhoenixFire Designs.
Help support Pet Cancer Awareness
I lost my beloved cat,
Kush, to cancer in 2003. Cancer is the #1 disease-related cause of death
for cats and dogs. With your support, together we can find a cure
ASPCA
The American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals
details
"seasons greetings 2009" ver.
25
originally created 12/7/09 and designed for 1024x768 or larger,
CSS capable browser Like
There are people on the net that
have nothing better to do with their time then be nasty to other
people online. They post rude comments, spend hours a day talking
about sites they hate so much, that they well, spend hours a day
talking about them. (lame) They mock the owners and posters for
their opinions and their right to free speech. They expect everyone
to fit into their narrow-minded little world view or else they throw
a temper tantrum.
To these people I say
grow up.
Here's a bit of info people...the
web is a HUGE place. If you don't like what I say here, or who I am,
or what I do, or talk about, or what I look like, or the color of my
hair, or whatever asinine thing you dwell on,
go somewhere else. It's really, really easy. Honest. You just
click the little "x" in the corner of your browser and *poof* the
offending, big, mean and nasty site has disappeared.
I pay for this site. It's mine.
That means I can use it for whatever the hell I want to. Don't like
it if I'm bitching about something in my life? Oh fucking well. Go
somewhere else. Think I'm stupid for expressing my thoughts? Too
fucking bad, don't read them. Somewhere along the line, someone
forgot this simple fact: Live and let live
Don't like me, cool, fine, whatever, I don't care. This
journal is NOT for you. It's for me. I'm not in it for popularity or
fame or anything stupid like that. I write it because I need to
write and express myself and get things out of my head sometimes. So
read or don't, it doesn't matter, but don't waste my time (or yours)
bitching about it.
*gets off soapbox*
: : seasons greetings : :
my handcrafted jewelry, wearable
horns and more!
all hand made
M. Turner
Po Box 1484
Elfers, FL 34680
Dreamhost is a great webhost with a TON of bandwidth and features. I
use them myself.
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for $25 off!
Monday, January 25, 2010
Two Months Today is two months since I lost my job due to the business closing. And I'm the only one who hasn't found a new job. The therapists have it easiest since many of them were working somewhere else in addition already or had their own private clients. They really just needed to find another room to rent or another group to join.
The other front desk person, Doris, had a job within about a week of the closing and has since found another job that she loves which is ironically right up the road from me. (She doesn't live right around here so the fact she's coming back to my side of town for a job is a little extra depressing.)
I've sent out more resumes than I can count. I've been on two interviews. And the closest I've come to a job is an offer of less then minimum wage and being an independent contractor on top of the low pay. I turned it down.
Everyone who knows me is like, "Oh, you are SO AWESOME and have SO MANY SKILLS and YOU'RE SO INTELLIGENT and ANYONE WOULD BE LUCKY TO HAVE YOU so don't worry! You'll find something!" And yeah, I *do* have really good skills, personality and intellect - but what good is it that only the people who already know me know this? I need to impress blind, unknown, and random strangers via a quick email blurb and a one-page resume. And so far, I don't know, it's not coming through? Or maybe, the problem is that most of the ads I'm replying to are turning out to be credit report scams. (You get an email back from some hotmail account saying you're perfect but to click this link and fill out a credit report request first and then they'll be thrilled to schedule your interview. Yeah right.)
Finding a part-time job is just so difficult. It's hard enough finding a regular job but when you're me and you have health restrictions and you physically are unable to work 40/hrs a week (Or heck, even like 32 or something I see sometimes listed as "part time") it severely limits your options. It took me a damned year last time to find my prior job. I can't go another year without work and feeling this way either. Besides the money, my mood is just in the absolute shitter.
I'm so blue. I'm just feeling worthless and dejected and it all feels so impossible so why even bother no one is looking for me and no one wants me. It feels like it's never going to happen. The hardest part is that there are no leads. None. I have no promising direction or ideas. There's nothing out there that's even a "possibility" or a "maybe." I don't even feel like, well, there's job A and job B and job C and I feel like I've got a good shot at job B. No. There isn't even a job out there to go for! Every listing for a receptionist or an admin asst, or office worker or secretary or clerical, etc. is full time. Many of them I sent my resume anyway with a note of my part-time status and a summary of my skills. Of course I never hear back.
I just feel worse and worse the longer this goes on. And now we're at the end of January and I don't even have the excuse to tell myself that no one was hiring over the holidays. Because the holidays are over. So now what's my excuse?
It just sucks. I'm trying to keep up a good outward appearance but I'm really very broken inside right now. And it's getting harder and harder to even get myself out of bed, let alone trudge through the job listings just to find absolutely nothing out there again.
Two months. It's just a ton of bricks crushing me today. And I don't know how it's going to turn around.
