30
year old Pagan female who lives in Florida with her guy and two
cats, loves Disney, reads fanatically, tinkers in photography and
believes growing up is overrated
Help support Pet Cancer Awareness
I lost my beloved cat,
Kush, to cancer in 2003. Cancer is the #1 disease-related
cause of death for cats and dogs. With your support, together we can
find a cure
ASPCA
The American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals
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"welcome spring -
daffodils" ver. 20
originally created 03/20/08 and designed for 1024x768 or larger,
CSS capable browser Like
There are people on
the net that have nothing better to do with their time then be nasty
to other people online. They post rude comments, spend hours a day
talking about sites they hate so much, that they well, spend hours a
day talking about them. (lame) They mock the owners and posters for
their opinions and their right to free speech. They expect everyone
to fit into their narrow-minded little world view or else they throw
a temper tantrum.
To these people I
say
grow up.
Here's a bit of
info people...the web is a HUGE place. If you don't like what I say
here, or who I am, or what I do, or talk about, or what I look like,
or the color of my hair, or whatever asinine thing you dwell on,
go somewhere else. It's really, really easy. Honest. You just
click the little "x" in the corner of your browser and *poof* the
offending, big, mean and nasty site has disappeared.
I pay for this
site. It's mine. That means I can use it for whatever the hell I
want to. Don't like it if I'm bitching about something in my life?
Oh fucking well. Go somewhere else. Think I'm stupid for expressing
my thoughts? Too fucking bad, don't read them. Somewhere along the
line, someone forgot this simple fact: Live and let live
Don't like me, cool, fine, whatever, I don't care. This
journal is NOT for you. It's for me. I'm not in it for popularity or
fame or anything stupid like that. I write it because I need to
write and express myself and get things out of my head sometimes. So
read or don't, it doesn't matter, but don't waste my time (or yours)
bitching about it.
*gets off soapbox*
: : w e l c o m e s p r i n g : :
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M. Turner
Po Box 1484
Elfers, FL 34680
win with me on blingo! I can vouch it really works. I've won
already.
In Other News... First off, thank you to everyone who took the time to comment or email their support and thoughts on my post(s) about the loss of Panda. It greatly moved me to have such a kind group of friends share in my sadness.
A Delayed Cold Realization But in trying to catch up beyond that point, I'm finally starting to feel better. What started off last week as a sore throat for about 36 hours, then turned into a itchy throat and then five full days of non-stop sneezing and running noses was apparently a cold and not just really bad allergies. By about day four, it dawned on me that this was exceptionally bad and there's no way my allergies would be this consistently evil. The sad thing is that I'm always so fatigued because of my chronic health issues that I wasn't actually able to identify being ill based on being "tired" or "run down." I just feel that way normally. It's a strange realization that I can't always actually easily identify the difference between something like general fatigue and a few days of bad allergies versus having a full-blown cold.
Today though, I woke up and could finally breathe after what feels like an eternity. Even yesterday - which was slightly better than it had been - was still plagued with far too much sneezing. This morning I didn't even have to take an allergy pill and I've sailed through the day. I should have realized sooner that even at their worst, my seasonal allergies are NEVER that bad.
The Neverending Rash And continuing the health updates, we're now at eight weeks I believe of my current PMLE outbreak. (For those who don't know: My skin reacts inappropriately to UV light such as the sun and my forearms break out in a rash due to a condition called "Polymorphic Light Eruption" or "PMLE" for short.) It was almost gone a few days ago. I was so thrilled because my skin, while still bumpy in texture, was no longer red at all. Today? Back to being bumpy AND quite angry red. I swear, I feel like I'll never have my arms look like a normal human being again. Sometimes I look at it and I feel like I'm just going to cry. It's not the rash itself, but just how ugly it makes me feel and my helplessness that it simply will NOT go away. Is it so much to ask that I can just go back to normal...? I guess so.
No Sew I've had my sewing machine for two weeks now and I've still yet to even turn it on. *sighs* I keep wanting to, but there's always something else to do or some reason I say I'll do it "later." So far though, "later" has yet to manifest. I just need to do it but...well, it's like anything. I've also been meaning to write an entry for several days too.
Budget Deficit Still absolutely zero luck in finding a part time job. Hell, I can't even get a retail job to call me for a damned interview. It's terribly upsetting and frankly disgusting. When you know you're MORE than qualified and all you want is a chance to earn a few damned dollars a week to help keep food on your table and gas in your car and you can't even get a call back, meanwhile the new crop of employees at stores you've applied to can't count change to save their life....ugh. It's frustrating. Right now, everything will be able to balance out - after May 9th. Of course, before then, I'm still trying to figure out how to manage power, cable AND rent. I've been so depressed about it all lately. I mean, deep, blue funk depressed. Like, nightmares and crying myself to sleep depressed. I've been trying not to let it show but, I don't know. Sometimes I just don't know what it's all for anymore. I really don't.
The End Ugh. Now I want to just go back and delete out the whole last section. I don't want to hear the troll comments and I just don't feel like dealing with defending myself to assholes who don't know what it means to live in the real world with the rest of us who struggle to get by in the day-to-day.
Fuck it, I'm not deleting tonight. This is MY journal and if I want to say I'm frustrated about money, that's MY right. Don't like it? You know how to close the page.
Anyway, this is going where I didn't intend. It's just that I'm so down right now. It's hard for it not to color my entry. So I better stop here.
)