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Saturday, November 23, 2002

hrm. change of plans. Seems my mom just got off the phone with another of her sisters and it looks like her oldest sister isn't going to make it the two days it would take to drive up there and be there. She's getting a flight out first thing tomorrow morning and will pretty much worry about getting back later. I can't go with her since 1) I don't fly and 2) it's going to cost $220 a person to get up there and I don't have the money and she doesn't either.

*breaths* What a trying week. At the holidays and the week of Thanksgiving like this and everything. More as I know it.

Well, looks like I'll be gone for the next week. My mother's oldest sister, who's been battling cancer, is losing and quickly. My mother and grandmother can't get flights to New York this week because of Thanksgiving, so instead are renting a car to drive up there. The two of them can not do this on their own, so I'm going with them to help the with the drive. Of course, this means I need to go out tomorrow and get winter clothes and shoes and such because, I live in florida and don't have any.

This is all very daunting. And sudden. So I'm in a bit of shock. Looks like we're leaving early Monday AM. More later.

So.... Thursday. I'm not feeling well, right? My friend Rand calls and wakes me up at 11:30am so he can pick me up to take to his mom's to teach her ACT. He gets to my place about 12:30pm, I puke because my stomach is just that miserable and I am feeling that shitty, and we get to his mom's about 1pm. He leaves, telling me his mom will be home from work about 3pm to do the training. I install the database (takes all of 10 minutes) and then lay on their couch and doze - very uncomfortably waking up many times - until about 4pm. She's still not home. She gets home like 4:15. Doesn't have a clue that I'm there and doesn't spend 30 seconds even looking at the program. I don't get to go home until about 6:30pm, having wasted my whole day, feeling sick and with a horrid headache from dozing in and out of sleep on their couch and having tentative plans to get together NEXT WEEK to start the training. ARG.

Then, there was Friday. Whew. I am beat. Today I cooked dinner and cleaned the apartment because I had my family over for dinner. Home cooked lasagna (with extra meat sauce on the side since my mother's a vegitarian), garlic bread, salad, and a yummy chocolate mouse cake from our local yummy market's premier bakery. Turned out really, really well though. Everyone wanted seconds and such, so that's always a good thing. They stayed until about 9pm - they stole some of our new cable to watch some A&E Biography on Charles Bronson. *shrugs* It was nice though.

After they headed home, we (my Love, Rand and I) sat and watched three more episodes from the ever cool Highlander: Season One dvd. Mmm....Highlander. (And I mean the show, not just the uber sexy, Adrian Paul who stars as Duncan McLeod in it - though my Love thinks he's the ONLY reason I watch the show! *lol*)

So...then I've been nosing about the net, chatting for the last like three hours, trying to finish writing this entry. (looks like I spent that much time on it right?) *lol* Anyway, I'm done so I'm gonna post. ttfn

Thursday, November 21, 2002

*cries*
I haven't manged to sleep more then like 5 hours a night everyday this week. I NEED 8 or else I get headaches; today is no exception. everyday I have to get up for something and today it's to teach someone to use ACT!. all I want to do is fucking sleep. *whimpers* head hurts, eyes hurt, body hurts, stomach's a mess. ARG i'm so tired!!!!

ugh.

Wednesday, November 20, 2002

ugh. ever have one of those times when you just aren't going to bed? For no good reason? Even though you're SUPER tired? I laid down for a nap at 7pm tonight because I was afraid I'd sleep through Buffy (at 8pm) otherwise. I was up until 8am, got barely 6 hours of sleep, had to clean the house and do laundry today and for some damned reason I'm on the pc instead of sleeping in my wonderfully comfortable bed! I'm insane!

I am so going to sleep now. I wanted to hit the sack like 11pm or 12am tonight. And now it's almost 5am! WTF? I'm not even doing anything. I'm just sitting around, staring mindlessly at the tv and pc! And I have to get up tomorrow because my mom's coming over. Sometimes I am just stupid, I swear.

*prodes myself* Shoo. go to bed.

Tuesday, November 19, 2002

So.....it was cool. I got to see the meteor shower afterall. I didn't think I was going to be able to. See, it went like this. Peek time for the shower was like 5-5:30am. My Love has to get up for work at 7am. These two things are not compatible. I couldn't see anything from my apartment complex, because it's just too darned bright, and I really didn't want to be driving to dark areas by myself at like 4-5am. (Ya know, just those little things like self-preservation and a lack of stupidity.) I knew I could go with Jef because he's up and he only works weekends, but his phone isn't connected, so there was no way for me to reach him. My Love goes to bed late - like 2am or so - and I walk away from the PC since mine is in the bedroom and he can't fall asleep with the monitor light and my loud typing.

So, I'm moping about on the couch for an hour or so when I just decide for no reason to go check my email. It's about 3am at this point. So I meander in and check my email (nada interesting), but since there wasn't anything interesting, I decide to check out my forum. I'm nosing about and I see there's like four or five people in the chat room. At this point in the tale, you have to understand something. I use Netscape. I was surfing with Netscape. The chat room had never once - not ONCE - loaded properly in Netscape. There was some sort of incompatibility. But, for no real reason, I decided to click the link anyway, and sure enough, it loaded immediately. Woah, cool. So I'm chatting with some people there when one of them asks me about Jef. I tell her I'll be hanging out with him tomorrow (now today, Tuesday) and she's like, "I haven't talked to him forever. "

Not two minutes later she says something along the lines of "Hey! Did you just tell Jef to message me?" And I was like WOAH! He's online? She relays a message to meet me in Yahoo Messanger - which I log in promptly - and I ended up getting to speak with him afterall. Whoo hoo! So I tell him how I wanted to reach him but I couldn't. He was at his mom's house, looking for me specifically, and the odd chain of events just worked out in such a way that it worked. It was awesome. So I tell him I really want to get to see the meteor shower, but I can't because my Love's in bed. He offers to come down and pick me up and bring me back over to his mom's neighborhood (there's a nice, really dark road a couple streets away) which is 30 minutes each way so I can get to see it. We confirm plans and he comes and gets me.

Ok, so it's 40 degrees outside - this is UBER cold for Florida and for me - and we're sitting outside, on some damp lawn chairs on the side of the road, where there are no street lights from about 4:30am until about 5:15am when we head back to his mom's to go get her since she was supposed to meet us. We get there just as she's pulling out of the driveway (we walked) and ride back with her. Someone else is parked down the road from where we camped out and we stayed out there until about 6am.

The shower was hit-and-miss. Still amazingly spectacular and very cool, but poor Jef missed seeing the really impressive ones. Some of then really looked like something out of the movies. It was breathtaking. (or was that the cold? lol). Others were fainter - it was dark enough, but there was a haze to the sky - but at some points, you could see them shooting off in all directions, several at once. Some of the larger ones looked like they were in slow motion - they left trails that faded gradually.

All-in-all, I was very glad to have seen it. I wish I could have planned better and gone out somewhere even more country to try to get even more of a view, but even what I saw was simply amazing. It was cold and I didn't get to sleep until 8am, but it was very, very cool.

Things you maybe shouldn't put on someone's tombstone...

Go take a look at this tombstone. It's both funny and mean all at the same time. I can't imagine it was an accident, but man, that's kinda harsh. (and funny, did I mention funny?)

--Thanks to Michael for the photo

So, your two-year old son dies by your neglegence, you have him embalmed, then you bring him home so you can pray to god to resurect him? (And you really believe this is a possibility? No really, I'm so not kidding.
Thanks to Orb for finding and posting this insane story.

Got to see meteor shower afterall. Just got home. Really tired. Haven't slept yet. Was cool. Details later after a good eight hours (or more) of sleep. g'night

Monday, November 18, 2002

Light Show of the Century For Europe and North America tonight!

Nov. 18 — One of the most anticipated meteor storms of modern times is about to send two flurries of comet debris raining down through Earth’s atmosphere. Peak activity for the Leonid meteor shower is due to arrive between now and when the sun comes up Tuesday. In the parlance of hurricane forecasters, the storm is nearly upon us, and all preparations should be rushed to completion. The Leonids won’t produce a dramatic shower again until at least 2033. The next time the annual event will perform as well as this year is likely to be 2098 or later, astronomers believe.

Robert Lunsford of the American Meteor Society figures that all adds up to 2002 being a must-see event. “This may be the last opportunity for many of us to see a true meteor storm,” Lunsford told Space.com. “The Leonids of 2033 and 2066 are predicted to be weak in comparison to the displays of the last few years.”
-source: http://www.msnbc.com/news/836634.asp


North America
Look for the first peek of lower meteors at 11pm EST. But, the real show is supposed to be the second peek which should take place between 4:30 - 5:30 a.m. ET (2:30 a.m. PT Tuesday. The show is expected to be best on the eastern coast, but impressive from anywhere in North America. Try to get as far away from lights as possible, to see as much of the shower as possible.

"I estimate folks in the U.S. should see about one Leonid every 6-10 seconds near the time of the peak," Cooke said, having taken into account the effect of the Moon. Residents of Canada and Mexico will see this outburst, too.
-source: http://www.space.com/spacewatch/leonids_lowdown_021101.html#forecast


Go out and watch! It's supposed to be an event not to miss! And, the last time to see this level of amazing display in our lifetime. And, it's a neat piece of history.

Crashing through the Past -- The Earth is actually passing through two debris streams tonight, and this is old, old comet dust we're encountering. "Europeans this year are running through the 1767 comet trail," said Yeomans. "North Americans will see meteors from the 1866 orbit."
-source: http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2002/11/1118_021118_leonids.html


Very cool everyone! Go out and do some stargazing tonight and enjoy the beauty and majesty of the night sky!


Oh yeah, I forgot. Last night I took a couple of silly pics and I liked these three of them. So, feel free to go check them out if you want. (by the way, the collected list of the pics on this site are accessable in a list when you click the "photos" button to the left, or by the menu list at giveneyestosee.com/m/photos. This way, you don't always have to just find the post where I mention the pics to see them. Didn't know if everyone realized that or not. I just post them here as well as a way to keep people updated.)


Click for gallery


Ok, for real now, I'm walking away from the pc! Honest!

Ah ha! Just got a call from Rand and his mom is home sick today so I'm not going over there afterall. Weee! This means I get to go lay down under some covers and rest a bit since I'm tired and my head hurts. (damned neck as usual giving me a headache). Brrr. It's chilly in here. I'm off in search of a blanket.

Woke up yesterday to the sound of the wind, blowing hard through the trees in front of our building and the sound of it whipping through all those little spots on the roof, between buildings, etc. It was glorious. We had wind gusts of like 20mph yesterday, all day. Lovely! Not to mention it was only in the 60's yesterday and it got down into the lower 50's and some 40's in the area as our overnight low. Mmmm....cool weather! :) This is the coldest it's gotten so far all year. Today is another day peeking in the 60's. It's so nice to get that cool, crisp, Autumn air. Today's forecast? Sunny this afternoon with no chance for rain. Highs will be in the mid and upper 60s. Winds will blow from the N/NE at near 15 mph Lovely!

This whole week sucks though since every single day is booked for me. I'm tired and want to be sleeping right now but I can't because I have to head over to my friend's house to work on ACT! for his mom and get it set up on her pc. I'll have to sit around and wait there too all day even if I finish in a few minutes because I don't have the car and need Rand to pick me up to bring me there in the first place. (as a matter fact I woke up at 11:30am because I figured he'd be here by now. Hrm.) Anyway, the whole week is this way. And it's kinda annoying. No "me" time.

Monday - go set up ACT! on pc for Rand's mom
Tuesday - hang out with Jef (which is cool)
Wednesday - my mom's coming over
Thursday - go teach Rand's mom how to use ACT!
Friday - cook and clean all day and have my family over for a dinner

UGH. There is NO breathing room there at all this week. And it blows. Grr. I guess I've really grown to like my more casual, take-the-days-as-they-come sorta schedule. Blah. Anyway, I gotta run. I need to go finish getting dressed since Rand should show up anytime now. (and if I don't get dressed, I'm going to end up going and laying back down. Damn I'm tired and damn the bed is nice and warm when the apartment is so very cold right now)

*sighs*

Sunday, November 17, 2002

I am so sick of lies and drama and bullshit. There are so many people on the net that just don't know how to let things go. They continue on, year after year, and spend obscene amounts of time hating people they don't even know. So I just walk away - ignore it and leave them be. Of course, that's not enough; it's never enough. They have to continue on, waging some war that never was.

But then I become privy to information I didn't want to know. I learn things that just make me think all the more taht I should just disappear once and for all. People who I thought of as friends; people I've talked with and enjoyed their commentary; people I've thought were honestly decent enough at the end of the day. But instead, they're liars. And the worst kind of liar at that - the kind who are nice to your face and then go behind your back and say how much they hate you; or how they hope you cause havoc. If you don't like someone,whatever, that's your business, but at least have the fucking balls to say it to their face. None of this covert shit where it's layers and layers of meaningless intrigue and conspiracy of who's really on who's side. I don't need fucking bullshit like this in my life. Not one fucking ounce of it.

And yes, it never seems to go away. I waste all this time and money and effort to keep having people pull the rug out from under me for no reason - or worse, for a reason of just trying to do harm. What the fuck is that about? I'm sick of it. I'm so weary of it I just want to go away forever and never come back. Kill off MemoryandDream and wipe my hands clean of the taint I've mucked in for four years trying to do something half-way fucking decent.

I'm so burnt out on it right now, the whole thing just sickens me. And I don't think I want to continue with this bullshit any longer. I really don't.

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